ABC/Todd Wawrychuk(HOLLYWOOD) — When Shonda Rhimes lost 150 pounds a few years ago, she discovered that her entire life was transformed, and not necessarily in a good way.
The creator of ABC shows including Grey’s Anatomy and Scandal wrote in her Shondaland newsletter that once she shed the weight, people began treating her differently.
For the first time, she noticed that people complimented her and seemed excited to chat with her — a shift she found more “horrifying” than the weight loss process itself.
“What the hell did they see me as before? How invisible was I to them then? How hard did they work to avoid me? What words did they use to describe me? What value did they put on my presence at a party, a lunch, a discussion?” she wrote.
She continued: “After I lost weight, I discovered that people found me valuable. Worthy of conversation. A person one could look at. A person one could compliment. A person one could admire. A person. You heard me. I discovered that NOW people saw me as a PERSON.”
Rhimes says she does not enjoy discussing her transformation, which, she wrote, she only made because she found simple tasks to be physically exhausting. Shonda says she still hates the conversations that revolve around her body. However, she felt the need to address it after an interview with Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body author Roxane Gay.
“These days, I feel like a chunky spy in a thinner world. Strangers tell fat jokes in front of me. Jokes not meant for me. But…for the woman I used to be 150 pounds ago. The woman I could be again one day. The woman I will always be inside,” Rhimes wrote. “Because being thinner doesn’t make you a different person. It just makes you thinner.”
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